August 16, 2008
6:00 PM
Saratoga Country Club
Saratoga, California
The Marriage Service
Prelude Wayne Hu
Divine Romance, Phil Wickham
Seating of the Grandparents
Maternal Grandmother of the Groom Popo Choy by Josh (Right side facing the front)
Maternal Grandmother of the Bride Popo Wong by Steve (Left side facing the front)
Seating of the Parents
Father of the Groom Wilson Tam, Grandfather of the Groom Yeh Yeh and wife May (Right side)
Mother of the Groom: Judy Choy by Jeremy (Right side)
Mother of the Bride: Diana Lee by Ryan (Left side)
Lighting of the Individual Candles
Mothers Judy Choy and Diana Lee light from memorial candle
Entrance of the Groom and Groomsmen
Pastor Don, Groom Joe Tam, Best Man David Batten, Groomsmen Jeremy Tam, Derek Tong, and John Pong
Processional
Bridesmaids
Elaine Yip
Jamie Lei
Kim Chan
Denise Lee Jang, Matron of Honor
Flower Girls: Kendra Wong & Nicole Fong
Ring Bearer: Jason Yee
(Congregation stands)
Bride Dana Lee and Father Daniel Lee (Left side)
So Close, Jon McLaughlin
Welcome
I welcome you to this beautiful setting and holy moment in the lives of Joe Tam and Dana Lee as we witness their exchange of marriage vows, the precious beginning of a lifetime commitment. Please be seated. For the sacredness of this moment, let me remind you to silent your cell phones at this time.
This afternoon, we are here to celebrate with Joe and Dana, their public declaration of their love and commitment. They stand here before us not with any giddy notion that confines love to a feeling, nor with the delusion that a wedding and a marriage are one in the same. Rather, they come before you with a wisdom born out of life’s experiences that a love that has matured in the soil of caring relationships when they first met at UC Davis.
They also stand before you as people of faith, deeply committed to Christ and his church. They recognize that unless God is the energy that powers their ever-growing relationship, their work at setting up a home is little more than vanity. They acknowledge that more important than the expectations each has for the other, are the expectations God has for the both of them. They affirm that it is God’s intention that the commitments made here today be held and cherished for as long as God graces them with life.
It is with these understandings and affirmations that Joe and Dana now pledge their faithfulness to each other in this service of marriage.
Let us pray.
Eternal God, we stand here in this garden that has been made beautiful by the touch of your creative hand. What a perfect place to celebrate the marriage of Joe and Dana! This display of your handiwork reminds us that, small as we are next to you, we, too, are a part of your grand design. O Lord, who brought all these visual delights into being, we thank you also for so creating us that we may find delight in one another. Be present with us now as Joe and Dana celebrate the beginning of their life together before you. In Jesus’ name we pray, Amen.
Presentation of Bride and Groom
Joe and Dana deeply appreciate the rich and warm heritage of their families and especially the love and nurture that they have received from their parents. Acknowledging that God has brought them together, who has the honor of presenting them to be married today?
(Parents stand up)
Parents: “We do!”
(Father of the Bride Daniel Lee embraces and kisses Bride Dana Lee and sits down.)
Parents Appreciation
As a sign of their love and respect for their parents, Joe and Dana will present potted flowers to their mothers and fathers thanking them for the years of guidance, wisdom and protection in life. Each of them came with one set of parents; each will leave with two.
(Joe and Dana present the gifts.)
Declaration of Intent
Joe and Dana, here in the presence of God and your family and friends, I ask you to declare your intention to enter into covenant with each other through the grace of Jesus Christ.
Joe, will you have Dana to be your wife, to live together in holy marriage? Will you love her, comfort her, honor and keep her, in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others, be faithful to her as long as you both shall live?
Joe: “I will.”
Dana, will you have Joe to be your husband, to live together in holy marriage? Will you love him, comfort him, honor and keep him, in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others, be faithful to him as long as you both shall live?
Dana: “I will.”
Scripture Reading: 1 John 3:18-24 Ryan Jang
Words to the Couple—A Friend Loves at All Times
Joe and Dana, it is a wonderful privilege to join with you in this joyous occasion, your wedding. Certainly all of us who have gathered here are honored to be with you as you make your vows before God and unite in Holy Matrimony. We call it “holy” because it is a very special, unique occasion during which we ask God to be involved in your marriage and in your home. We pray for God to join you together so that you are truly one and remain in that oneness “until death do you part.”
Since that first time that you met at an AACF ice cream social at UC Davis, you no doubt have been growing ever closer to one another. You started out as being just acquaintances by knowing common friends. Then you became friends, then good friends, then really good friends, steady boyfriend and girlfriend, inseparable. After Joe accepted a dare to shave off all his hair and Dana didn’t like his baldness one bit, you still remain really good friends. You bonded so well that you decided you would rather be with each other than with anyone else on earth. You grew so deeply in love that all you could think of was getting married. And here you are! In the Scripture that was read from 1 John 3, you first loved in word or speech but now you plan to love in truth and action.
It’s tempting to talk about all of the ingredients of a good and lasting marriage. I will focus upon one simple word which, if you will always take it seriously, you will be greatly blessed as you journey through life together. It is the word, “friendship.”
Anyone who studies truly healthy and happy marriages will find that the husband and wife are great friends. They not only love each other, they like each other. They want to be together, to laugh together, to work together, to create a loving family together, to face all of life’s difficulties and blessings together, and yes, even to cry together when the occasion calls for tears. One of the things that you like to do is to stay home as a couple, create a comfortable home that is genuinely welcoming, watch TV shows like “The Office” and Netflix movies together, and simply to spend time together talking and dreaming about life’s possibilities. That is what good friends do together.
The book of Proverbs says, “A friend loves at all times…” (17:17). This is what I would have you remember. Be there as a loving friend for one another at all times, in all circumstances.
There’s a story of a wife who was fussing too much because her husband wasn’t getting done all the things in the house and yard she thought he should have done. To solve the problem, they made a complaint box and each could put in any complaint that one had with the other. After 60 days they opened the box and counted the complaints. The wife had 12 complaints against her husband. Her husband, however, had put in only three “complaints” (if they can be called that). Each of his papers carried only three words, “I love you.” After that, the wife threw out the box and quit complaining. Their loving friendship was restored.
When Joe is searching the internet about the newest electronics and wanting to have it, Dana would send an instant message that reads, “I love you.” When Dana would rather sit inside the club floor to watch a Giants game where it is warm and cozy, Joe would whisper in Dana’s ear, “I love you.” Instead of taking little jabs at each other, write messages that say, “I love you.” Again as your Scripture passage reads, “we believe in the name of his Son Jesus Christ and love one another.” Being good friends is a lifetime of laughing and having fun together and remembering that you love each other.
Continue to keep strong your steadfast friendship. If you will, I promise you great joy and many blessings in your marriage and home life.
Exchange of Vows
Joe and Dana will commit to each other their love and friendship by the sharing of the following vows.
Joe: I, Joe, take you, Dana, to be my wedded wife,
To have and to hold from this day forward
For better, for worse
For richer, for poorer
In sickness and in health
To love and to cherish
So long as we both shall live.
Dana: I, Dana, take you, Joe, to be my wedded husband,
To have and to hold from this day forward
For better, for worse
For richer, for poorer
In sickness and in health
To love and to cherish
So long as we both shall live.
Exchange of Rings
For many centuries, a wedding ring has been a symbol of a pledge that those who give a ring intend to live up to the vows and promises made at the time of marriage. A ring is a visible sign of an inward grace that signifies the givers and receivers becoming one in holy marriage through the church of Jesus Christ.
Let us pray. O Lord, enable Joe and Dana to be aware of this sacred moment when they receive evidence of their love and loyalty to one another. May we know your peace and your favor as they begin their new life together, through Jesus Christ our Lord, Amen.
Joe: Dana, I rejoice in putting this ring on your finger.
It is a symbol of my great love for you
And my pledge of faithfulness to you
Wear this ring with confidence
That I will be present for you
Even as I am sure you will be present for me
I make this vow before God.
Dana: Joe, I rejoice in putting this ring on your finger.
It is a symbol of my great love for you
And my pledge of faithfulness to you
Wear this ring with confidence
That I will be present for you
Even as I am sure you will be present for me
I make this vow before God.
Lighting of the Unity Candle
Joe and Dana’s mothers lit individual candles to symbolize the precious gift of life that they were given when their children were born. Spanning across the years, they along with their fathers supported Joe and Dana to this day and will no doubt continue supporting and guiding them in the future.
Now Joe and Dana’s individual lives are joined in marriage symbolized by the Unity Candle. They declare that their life together will shine in the world with warmth and brightness for many. The Unity Candle, a keepsake for them to relight on their anniversaries now burns, signifying their new, shared married life.
Hymn, Brooke Fraser
Wedding Prayer
Father of love, we know love because we know you through Jesus Christ who called us friends. We commit Joe and Dana to you today. You have heard these promises spoken. You have seen this covenant from the beginning, through friendship, to courtship, to this lifelong commitment. While we reach the end of a ceremony, it is just the beginning of this new life together. Bless Joe and Dana always. Plant the roots of their love for each other in the depths of your love. Let them love each other as you have loved them. Let them befriend each other countless times through the years to come. Give them the faith to come to you together for all their needs. We know that you will not leave them wanting. You are our life, so be the life in this relationship. We have nothing without you, but with you we have everything. And so Joe and Dana have everything they need in you. Bless this marriage to your glory. Amen.
Announcements
After the recessional, Joe and Dana have requested that all immediate family members return to this setting for wedding pictures.
Following this service, we would like you to recess out so that the folding chairs can be cleared. You are then invited to return to this area for a pre-reception of beverages and Chinese sweets that Joe and Dana specifically requested. Dinner down in the clubhouse will be served at 7:00 at which time Joe and Dana will look forward to greeting you.
Declaration of Marriage
Joe and Dana, you both came to this ceremony today because of the love that you share. With sincerity you have made sacred promises to each other in the presence of your family, your friends, and your God. Continue to be with each other as the Proverbs says, “A friend loves at all times.” Take those walks together to see God’s beautiful creation in the people God made or the wondrous display of his natural handiwork all around us. Even when you are at your favorite shopping store, Costco, with all those big screen TVs and electronics in front of you, enjoy your time being together looking at all the things that they have and resisting the temptation of buying. Good friends can spend precious time together and enjoy every minute of it. Your marriage is based on your loving friendship that you have for a lifetime. And always remember to pray together and serve Christ together by making God the center of your marriage.
Joe and Dana, because you have publicly made your vows to each other today, have given and received rings as an outward sign of an inward love for each other, and have lit your Unity Candle to signify the oneness you have together in Christ, I as a Minister of the Christian Gospel now declare you to be husband and wife. United in this special way, Joe and Dana, face the future as very good friends, assured of God’s love for you always.
May you experience loving companionship in your life together
So that if one falls, one may pick the other up
So that if one is cold in the Bay Area, one may give the other warmth
So that if one is laughing, one may share the laughter
So that if one is craving for Coffee Crunch Cake, one may happily go to Eastern Bakery to buy some
So that if one is dreaming of having children and traveling to exotic places, one may share those dreams
You came as very good friends, you leave as very loving friends
You came as two, today you leave as one.
It is my joy and honor to introduce to you for the very first time, “Joe and Dana Tam.” (Permission to kiss)
Recessional
Prelude
Officiant: Rev. Don Ng
Wedding Coordinator: Jennifer Tom