September 14, 2012, 7:00 PM
Call to Worship & Opening Prayer
God is gracious. He heals the brokenhearted, and binds up their wounds. Great is our Lord, and abundant in power; his understanding is beyond measure. Jesus said, “Come to me, all you that are weary and are carrying heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.” (Psalm 147: 1c, 3, 5: Matthew 11:28, 29; 5:4)
On behalf of Linda Wilson, John Tom and Anne Tom and their families, I welcome you here today to remember the long life of Mrs. Shuk Han Tom. We celebrate her productive life and God’s mercies on her and God’s grace on all of us. You have come perhaps to seek comfort from your grief. You have come to give honor and respect to a good life praying that you too may receive such good things that come from God. You have come to offer sympathy and compassion to Mrs. Tom’s family to which this family is most thankful for your thoughts and presence. We hope that you will receive as much as you have given your time and presence to be here.
We have a wonderful service planned for this evening that involves a number of the family members. Through their life experiences, they will undoubtedly present the wonderful life and faithful witness of Shuk Han Tom who was born on February 15, 1922 and returned to the Lord on September 4, 2012 having lived for 90 years.
Let us pray.
O God, your care is like that of a father who has compassion for his children and a mother who comforts her child. We cast our heavy burdens of grief on you. Be gracious with us in our anguish. Grant us the comfort of your rest. Assure us with the confidence that your faithful servant, Shuk Han Tom has been received into the arms of your mercy, in the blessed rest of your eternal care. May our lives hereafter bear witness to the hope that is ours in the crucified and risen Christ, who defeated death for our sake and now reigns victorious in your glory. Through his name we pray, Amen.
Scripture Readings
Playing in the Streets
Sojourners who come to America over 60 years ago like those who are still emigrating today work hard and often tarry alone to make ends meet. Unlike a world where one would share the familiarity of culture, history, and language, coming to America is for the brave who possess a pioneer spirit. When Mrs. Shuk Han Tom accepted the hand for marriage and an opportunity to come to America, she gave up all that she knew and opened a door to a brave new world in 1948.
One can imagine that in China, there would be Chinese games and activities that would fill the people’s pastimes and serve as distractions to the day-to-day work to make a living. There would be time to play and not always labor. But when one gives up that life of origin and embarks to find a new life of opportunities, play is usually the farthest thought from one’s mind.
Mrs. Tom and her husband worked in a restaurant in LA, ran a flower shop, and for most of her life, Mrs. Tom worked as a seamstress in a typical Chinese sewing factory where it was hot and sweaty. As a distraction from her hard and tedious work and to connect with friends who also lived a hard and grinding life, Mrs. Tom’s number one passion was to play mah jong. She loved the game so much that she was literally “on call” when the game needed a fourth.
Mah jong is a game of skill, strategy and calculation. One can easily learn how to play and most people can even master the Chinese names for each of the 136 tiles but the most skilled and winning players who play the game have good memory and an outstanding nerve to play the odds. The most skilled players would memorize the pattern of who is discarding what tiles and who may be taking certain tiles. Pretty soon, a skilled player has a pretty good reading of what her opponents’ hands are. Since Mrs. Tom always seems to win, she was a very skillful player.
She applied that skill by remembering to prepare her children’s favorite foods like taking a cut of good steak and coating it with “Shake and Bake” to fry. She didn’t have to visit a sightseeing place like Disneyland more than once because experiencing it one time and remembering what it was like was sufficient for her not go back again. Her love for her children was demonstrated when she remembered to buy Anne a new Disneyland mug that she accidentally broke.
The prophet Zechariah (8:1-8) spoke about God’s promise to Israel that one day God will return to Jerusalem and it will be a faithful city and it will be called a holy mountain. One day, “Old men and old women shall sit in the streets of Jerusalem, each with a staff in hand because of their great age. And the streets of the city shall be full of boys and girls playing in its streets.”
God, like the way he promised his people that they will live long lives and that boys and girls will feel safe to play in the streets, has blessed Mrs. Tom with that promise and we have seen it to come true. She lived a long life of 90 years old. She along with other old men and old women would play mah jong long into the dark hours of the night. As a loving and caring mother, she provided a home where her children can play safely and grow up to become people whom she can be most proud.
I heard that when Mrs. Tom would win her mah jong games, she would pass out her winnings to her children. They would take the coins to buy candy and perhaps buy things to play in the streets.
When Jesus was teaching and healing, his disciples who were adults felt that Jesus had more important things to do then to spend time with children. But Jesus interrupted the disciples and told them to bring the children to him so that he may meet them, bless them and perhaps even play with them. We all know that when we are in the presence of children, the very first thing they would say is, “Come and play with me.” Knowing Jesus, he did just that. Jesus gave up his life for all of us including children who love to play.
Living in America is never as easy as we think or like to believe. But Mrs. Shuk Han Tom taught us how to brave the new world for most of the time as a single mother, was faithful to her husband and her children, and lived a long and productive life. Mrs. Tom also found time to play, to play mah jong and in so doing, taught her own children how to survive in America and to also never to forget how to play too.
Let us pray.
Eternal and loving God, Giver of Life, we thank you for all the stages of our lives, from birth to death and beyond death.
We praise you for the freshness, the innocence, the wide-eyed curiosity of childhood.
We thank you for the wildly, exciting trials of adolescence, for youthful dreams.
We praise you for all the right choices we made in early maturity and beg your forgiveness for making so many wrong ones.
We thank you for the satisfaction of our later maturity: for teaching us, sometimes painfully, how to give more and to expect less in return.
And we praise you for as many sunset years as you may have in store for us: for fragments of wisdom, for grandchildren, and for the courage to face our mortality strengthened by the promise of a more perfect life, thanks to the love and willing sacrifice of your blessed Son.
Thank you, O God, for the life of your child, Shuk Han Tom, ended here, resumed with the Lord. Amen.
Announcements
If you wish to make a memorial gift, the family has requested that you can make donations to the First Chinese Baptist Church, Lady Shaw Senior Center, and the Coming Home Hospice in memory of Mrs. Shuk Han Tom. More detail information can be found in your program.
When you exit, you will be given two small envelopes. The white envelope contains a piece of candy to symbolize sweetness in a bittersweet situation. The red envelope contains a coin for you to buy something on your way home to suggest that you will continue to prosper and to have a healthy life.
There will be a Funeral Service at 11:00 AM tomorrow here at Halsted when we’ll continue to remember and celebrate the life of Mrs. Tom. Final interment will be private after cremation. Following tomorrow’s service, there will be a Memorial Meal at the Canton Restaurant on 655 Folsom Street in San Francisco where the family looks forward to fellowshipping with you. See the funeral program for detail information.
Benediction
Remember, beloved brothers and sisters, God has promised to bless us and keep us in this life and in our new life with the Lord.
The same God whose face now shines on our friend, Shuk Han Tom, has promised, through the Lord, to forgive us and to shelter us throughout eternity.
I charge you to find your comfort and peace in these gracious promises of a loving God.
The Lord bless you and keep you. The Lord make his face to shine upon you, and be gracious to you. The Lord lift up his countenance upon you, and give you peace.
Shuk Man Tom Funeral
September 15, 2012, 11:00 AM
Call to Worship & Opening Prayer
For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; a time to throw away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; a time to seek, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to throw away; a time to tear, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; a time to love, and a time to hate; a time for war, and a time for peace. (Ecc. 3:1-8) We thank God for giving us all the seasons of life and for the opportunity to come together today.
On behalf of Linda Wilson, John Tom and Anne Tom and their families, I welcome you here today to remember the long life of Mrs. Shuk Han Tom. We celebrate her productive life and God’s mercies on her and God’s grace on all of us. You have come perhaps to seek comfort from your grief. You have come to give honor and respect to a good life praying that you too may receive such good things that come from God. You have come to offer sympathy and compassion to Mrs. Tom’s family to which this family is most thankful for your thoughts and presence. We hope that you will receive as much as you have given your time and presence to be here.
Today’s service involves a number of the family members. Through their life experiences, they will undoubtedly present the wonderful life and faithful witness of Shuk Han Tom who was born on February 15, 1922 and returned to the Lord on September 4, 2012 having lived for 90 years.
Let us pray.
Creator God, we trust you to guide us through every season of life. You carry us from death to life, from weeping to laughing, from morning to dancing, and from silence to speaking. Inspire us to experience every season in its fullness, and to trust that nothing lasts forever—except for your eternal love. As we journey through life as Mrs. Shuk Han Tom has done, strengthen us with the assurance that we will always belong to you, whether in life or death; through your Son, Jesus the Lord. In Jesus’ name we pray, Amen.
Scripture Readings
Button Things Together
After World War II, Chinese women came to America perhaps in the thousands and worked at the sewing manufacturing factories to produce the expensive garments in department stores and boutiques. I always wondered if the availability of Chinese women who were willing to do fine detail sewing and were paid very low piece work wages was the cause of the sewing industry or whether the industry needed cheap laborers and encouraged Chinese to come to America. For whatever reason, Mrs. Shuk Han Tom was one of the countless Chinese women who crouched over fabric pieces with thread and needle or behind sewing machines in hot conditions to produce huge quantities of affordable priced clothes that made factory owners rich, consumers happy, and the lowly seamstress always just getting by.
Mrs. Tom’s job was mainly sewing on the buttons. Today, machines do all the buttons on clothes. That’s the reason why for every new piece of clothing that you buy today, they always include an additional button or two. They know that the machine-sewn button could easily fall off. One time I had to re-sew all the buttons on a barn jacket that I bought. But when Mrs. Tom sewed on her buttons, I’m sure they wouldn’t come off because they were done by hand and probably tied and knotted a number of times.
A well sewn button keeps the clothing together. A buttoned sweater would keep the child warm. A buttoned back pocket on a pair of pants protects the person’s wallet from theft. A fancy and decorative button can dress up a shirt to be extraordinary. What Mrs. Tom did at the sewing factory was to keep things together like the way she kept life together.
Since her husband was a baker on a merchant ship and therefore was not home for long stretches of time, it was often up to Mrs. Tom to keep her family together—all buttoned down. And when her husband died in 1974, Mrs. Tom pulled the family together for the rest of her life for almost 40 years. For these seasons of her life, it was a time to tear and a time to sew. As a single mom, she did everything and never complained. And since many of us know her son, John, Mrs. Tom must have had her hands full. She cooked and made rice the old-fashioned way with a pot that you watched so that the water would not boil over.
In the book of Proverbs 31, we find a wonderful passage that speaks about a capable woman like Mrs. Tom.
A capable wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels.
The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain.
She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life.
She rises while it is still night and provides food for her household and tasks for her servant girls.
She puts her hands to the distaff and her hands hold the spindle.
She opens her hand to the poor, and reaches out her hands to the needy.
She is not afraid for her household when it snows, for all her household are clothed in crimson.
She makes herself coverings; her clothing is fine linen and purple.
She makes linen garments and sells them; she supplies the merchant with sashes.
Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come.
We can also say that she sews buttons so that her children can be warm and that she is capable of pulling the things of life together to create a happy home.
Now and then, I would still need to sew back on a button. Buttons are not sewn on as well these days by machines. When we sew on a button with the usual four holes and we tie and knot it securely on the back of the garment, we are reminded of how God brings the world together in the love made known to us in Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior. When the world is torn apart because of our sin and disobedience, God’s love in Jesus on the cross ties us back together with God our Father. When we button our clothes together, we remember Jesus has reconciled our relationship with God that has been apart and separated to be back together again.
In Proverbs 31, a capable woman is one who
“looks well to the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness.” Mrs. Tom lived and worked a long time for her household.
In Proverbs 31, a capable woman is one whose
“children rise up and call her happy.”
Mrs. Tom’s children, Linda, John, and Anne along with her grandchildren and grandson praise her today. Whenever you button up, you’ll always remember both the love of God in Christ and the love of Mrs. Tom for you.
Let us pray.
Creator and Provider God, at this time of all times, we thank you for the precious gift of life.
We thank you for health—and for the skill and compassion of those who care for us when our health falters and fails.
We thank you for home: for the roof over our heads and the bed where we stretch out each night to renew our strength in sleep; and for the loved ones who make that roof and that house and all the rest into a true home.
And we thank you for hope: hope for the pursuit of the next goal when one goal has been reached; hope for recovery and a fresh start when a goal has eluded us; hope at last, when all hope seems lost, except for the one shining hope set before us in your raising our Lord Jesus from death.
Thank you, O God, for the life of your child, Shuk Han Tom, ended here, resumed with the Lord. We pray all these things in Jesus Christ’s precious name. Amen.
Announcements
If you wish to make a memorial gift, the family has requested that you can make donations to the First Chinese Baptist Church, Lady Shaw Senior Center, and the Coming Home Hospice in memory of Mrs. Shuk Han Tom. More detail information can be found in your program.
When you exit, you will be given two small envelopes. The white envelope contains a piece of candy to symbolize sweetness in a bittersweet situation. The red envelope contains a coin for you to buy something on your way home to suggest that you will continue to prosper and to have a healthy life.
Final interment will be private after cremation. Following this service, the family invites you to a Memorial Meal at the Canton Restaurant on 655 Folsom Street in San Francisco where the family looks forward to fellowshipping with you. See the funeral program for detail information.
Benediction
I challenge you now, beloved in the Lord, to face bravely the journey that our friend, Shuk Han Tom has completed, having arrived safely in God’s kingdom.
Journey on, without the fear of falling, without any pretense about the true state as a sinner in need of God’s saving grace.
Journey on, with tender memories of Shuk Han Tom and so many others who have gone before you, secure in the hope that, when your time comes, the love of God will be sufficient for you, thanks to our Lord Jesus Christ.
Now to him who is able to keep you from falling, and to make you stand without blemish in the presence of his glory with rejoicing, to the only God our Savior, through Jesus Christ our Lord, be glory, majesty, power and authority before all time and now and forever. Amen.