Luke 15:1-3; 11b-32
June 17, 2001
Sermon preached by Rev. Donald Ng at the First Chinese Baptist Church in San Francisco
It’s Father’s Day. Did you do anything special for your father today? What did you do? Now if this was Mother’s Day, you may have bought your Mom a corsage or a box of See’s Candy. This is what I got.
When the first “father’s day” holiday was established, there were no Hallmark cards to give. Mrs. John B. Dodd, of Washington, first proposed the idea of a “father’s day” in 1909. Mrs. Dodd wanted a special day to honor her father, William Smart. William Smart, a Civil War veteran, was widowed when his wife died in childbirth with their sixth child. Mr. Smart was left to raise the newborn and his other five children by himself. It was after his newborn became an adult that she realized the strength and sacrifice her father had shown in raising his children as a single parent.
In 1966 President Lyndon Johnson signed a presidential proclamation declaring the third Sunday of June as Father’s Day.
So today has become a day to not only honor your father, but all men who act as a father figure. Stepfathers, uncles, grandfathers, SS teachers, youth advisors, basketball coaches and other adult male friends are all to be honored on Father’s Day.
But how many fathers in comparison to mothers come to church? In the history of the church, generally women and mothers are more active in the church than men and fathers. Could it be that, fathers and men today are not able to identify with God? Perhaps on this Father’s Day, we may take a fresh look at God as Father.
The Forgiving Father
Today’s Scriptures is the familiar parable we come to know as “The Prodigal Son.” Since Jesus himself didn’t give a title to this story, it might also be called the “Loving Father,” “Waiting Father,” or the “Forgiving Father.” The focus of the parable could as easily be on the father as it is on the son.
Now we have a hothead of a younger son who is arrogant and self-centered. He thinks he can sell space heaters in the Sinai. The son asks for his share of his father’s estate, in advance of his father’s death. This request is a terrible insult in the culture of ancient Near East—as it is even for today! He is saying, in effect, “Father, you are dead to me!”
After the younger son squandered away his money in destitute living, partying with friends and prostitutes, he had to work as a hired hand and would have gladly eaten what the pigs ate. He was that bad off.
Of course, the kid returns home. Now you can see yourself here, right? I often called our son, “prodigal” especially on some of the things he did when he was in college!
Now if this kid was mine and he came home after what he has done, I would give him one of these: “knuckles on the head.” If I was a typical Chinese father with “machismo,” true male genes, I’d either bar the gates and send this scoundrel son packing, or at the very least, I’d give him a hosing down with enough spitting words to wash a car!
Now if the father of the Prodigal Son didn’t have the guts to discipline his son, the older brother certainly had enough reasons to do so. “Come on, Dad, give him what he deserves. He’s got it coming!” Keep in mind that the older brother wasn’t just acting like a father figure here. It wasn’t that honorable. Self-interest was driving the older brother to become mean-spirited.
According to Jewish custom, the elder son would receive twice the portion of the other sons. So if the younger son wasted his share and has now returned home, it means that the father would eventually take what is still in the estate postmarked for the elder son to divide up again with the younger brother. I think the older brother would rather not see his brother come home.
The father doesn’t act that way, and in fact, behaves in quite the opposite manner, showing tenderness, forgiveness, and mercy.
Tenderness? That’s what girls do. Forgiveness? Oh, only women take time to talk and work toward forgiving each other. Mercy? The “Terminator” never showed mercy in the movies.
The father in the story of the Prodigal Son doesn’t resemble the typical human father of being stern, harsh, and unrelenting. But instead, the father portrays what may be more typically the characteristics of what mothers are like?
Is that the reason why today’s men find it so difficult to identify with God? Do we want a strong, mean, testosterone God?
Scripture offers a view of God as Father. But it also depicts God with a wide-range of human emotions. In our text for today, we get a glimpse of God’s full acceptance of those who rebel and return. It’s full acceptance that comes even before the prodigal son makes his confession. When the son was still far away, the loving father saw his boy and filled with love and compassion ran and put his arms around him and kissed him—even before the son utters a single word of apology.
This story demonstrates just how committed God is to reconciliation. Working for reconciliation is not gender-specific. You don’t have to be a mother to bring healing and wholeness in this world.
Restorative Justice
The biggest news this past week was the execution of Timothy McVeigh. It is unimaginable for us to sympathize enough with the family and friends who lost loved ones in the country’s most hideous internal terrorist violence. And when McVeigh confessed his acts of murder but showed no remorse moments before he died, we are left with perhaps feelings that justice was finally done.
I know this is not the time or place to discuss the many intricacies of capital punishment. But I do wonder if after such a horrible tragedy that raw revenge solves our need for healing.
In Exodus 21, we justify in serious injury that you are to take life for life, eye for eye, tooth for tooth, hand for hand, foot for foot, burn for burn, wound for wound, bruise for bruise. Life for life is a justification for capital punishment. It is raw and naked revenge.
The true meaning of justice must include both the victim and the offender. Jesus didn’t call for revenge on his killers—instead, he said, “Father, forgive them; for they do not know what they are doing.” Revenge is replaced by reconciliation.
A pastor tells of a time when he walked into the physical therapy office for his bi-weekly treatment. A new assistant greeted him. His name was Sean. He was blonde, slight in built and had a cheery look about him. He noticed that he seemed to have a bit of a speech impediment.
After the physical therapist did her usual work, she asked Sean to give the pastor’s arm an ultrasound treatment. As he worked, Sean mentioned the Christian singer they’d just heard on the radio. He said he knew a lot of her songs because of singing them at church.
When the pastor asked him about the education he’d received for his work, he explained he’s been to vocational school to train for his current job, but that he was planning to return to school to learn to fit people with prosthetics and train them to use them. Sean said, “I have a prosthetic,” nonchalantly.
Then Sean told the pastor his story. When he was 16, he was playing basketball in his driveway, and suddenly a car bulleted into their yard, struck him, careened into a brick wall, then swerved back to hit him again. For awhile it looked as though he wasn’t going to live. He had to learn everything all over again: how to talk, how to eat and how to walk.
The pastor asked him if he or his parents felt bitter toward the driver who caused the accident. Sean said, “Not at all. God is turning it into a good thing.” Sean had been married for two months, and his spirit was sweet. The grace of Christ was in his life.
The law requires an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth. But faith enables us to replace revenge with reconciliation.
The world out there expected Sean to sue the driver for everything he had. The driver is liable to compensate for all of the sufferings endured. As American people, we justified the execution of McVeigh even for the reason of bringing closure to the pain suffered by the victims’ families. Society expected the father of the Prodigal Son to administer punitive justice. He deserved to eat what the pigs ate and work off his disobedient ways as a hired hand. But the father was committed to reconciliation instead of revenge.
Forgiving Father God
When we look at Scripture, even with a careful eye to inclusiveness, the reference to God is most often male. There are good reasons for this. The male metaphor emerges not just because of the paternalistic milieu in which the Scriptures were formed, for God would not allow a defective image to portray his nature—whatever the cultural ethos. The masculine character of God allows for a more comprehensive understanding of God’s nature.
You see, biblical fathers, if they were true to their role, had hierarchical duties as the head of families and clans to impose justice or show mercy. The father in the Prodigal Son story in biblical context was the only one who could have granted restorative justice and hold back punishment.
As God brought justice and mercy into the world in Jesus Christ, we should do that as well.
Today’s Fathers
We see that in contemporary families, the role of fathers as the “head of the house” has changed. The notion of God as only a father figure has been questioned in the church. And if you were to talk to any football players, it’s very PC to leave the Father out and to hug the Mother.
So today, we want to say “Happy Father’s Day, God!” And we invite fathers to model after God himself. We invite fathers to teach their sons and daughters what it means to be truly spiritual and what it means to have a deep connection with Jesus Christ. We ask fathers to renounce senseless violence and unbridled rage as being anti-male and anti-God.
Fathers and mothers are the key to strong and healthy families and offer the best prospect for sons and daughters who will grow up to love God and become committed disciples of Jesus Christ.
No, we are not saying that single mothers or single fathers can’t raise their children beautifully. But we are saying that all things being equal, children growing up in homes with parents, do better in life than others less advantaged. And children with godly, spiritual fathers, do even better.
By helping to reclaim God the Father in our Christian faith, it may be the key to reconnecting more fathers and guys to the church. When the Prodigal Son discovered that his father was forgiving and good, he repents of his sins and discovers how to become a good son. When we are able to believe that God is forgiving, loving and a good Father in heaven, men, fathers, guys, and boys discover how we can become good sons to God our Father. When fathers become forgiving, and show mercy, and love kindness, fathers discover that their own sons and daughters will grow up to become good children.
Facing Tomorrow
A pediatrician studied how mothers and fathers tend to carry their babies. Mothers usually hold their babies with them facing inward toward the mother’s body and space. Sometimes, they would carry them over the shoulder giving the child a view of the world the mother just passed through.
Fathers, on the other hand, tend to carry the baby with the child’s face forward. The baby’s butt on the father’s upturned palm, body tucked between the father’s biceps and side of the chest gives the baby the same view of the world the father has, that is approaching it head on. In America, we call this the “football position.”
I’m not too sure what’s my point here. But we might be able to say that God the Father out of his love for the world confronted the world head on and granted forgiveness and showed mercy. 2000 years ago, we received forgiveness from God in the life and sacrifice in Jesus Christ. As we face the world out there, we still need God to show us the way. We still need God the Father to continue to demonstrate for us that justice and mercy are still new things that our world still needs. We need God to bring healing for renewal, healing of broken-ness, healing to violence in our society.
When fathers carry their babies facing the world, they need to first respond to the heavenly Father, on Father’s Day and everyday. As fathers, they need to be like the Prodigal Son and return home to God. Fathers need to be like the Loving Father in the parable and embrace their own children.
Fathers need to support their families through the years of difficulty and often unpleasant work, as men have done for centuries. They may need to struggle with God and with the temptation and with evil, as Jesus did throughout his own life.
In this study about how mothers and fathers tend to carry their babies, there is one thing in common that they do. Eighty percent of the time both mothers and fathers hold the child on their left side. We all tend to hold babies next to the beats of our hearts.
Our Father God holds us close to his heartbeats too—for God is not dead like the Prodigal Son implied. God’s heart beats in us as we all serve as mothers and fathers to God’s children everywhere.
Let us pray.